so i just wandered for like nearly 2 hrs...its kinda ridiculous...i know it myself...but it kinda felt like the only thing to do...therapeutic in a sense...

i guess what you said makes sense...just needa implement the rationalization...its the toughest stage in the entire process man...hahaha...i still can't believe myself man...how come?! why?! did i just totally lose my mind?!

Post-sec attempt at song-writing...

Title: Listen to me

Verse 1:
Alone at night I sit and write
Dreadful plight beyond the light
Tales to tell, but no one’s here to listen

Bright and cheerful as day may be
So am I, or so it seems
All I need is for you to listen

So hear me please…

Chorus:
I am just a girl, fragile as can be
Tough I may seem, but not underneath
Longing for someone to be there for me
Someone who’ll just listen to me

Verse 2:
I lie awake away from serenity
The thoughts hit me like thunder and lightning
Resounding in my mind, pounding at my heart

Day breaks and so do I
Into pieces from tears shed last night
Pent up feelings with only me to bear

So hear me please…

Chorus:
I am just a girl, fragile as can be
Tough I may seem, but not underneath
Longing for someone to be there for me
Someone who’ll just listen to me

Bridge:
Where are you?
Come find me
Do you even exist?
Wake me up from my sub-consciousness!

Chorus:
I am just a girl, fragile as can be
Tough I may seem, but not underneath
Longing for someone to be there for me
Someone who’ll just listen to me

Would you listen to me?


Have kinda changed quite a fair bit since then...negated repression...i'm grateful that i don't feel the same need for this song anymore =)

Delusion takes its place
Night breaks into silence
Chaos does its laps
The stirring doesn’t stop

From the extreme end of the spectrum
Shining through
Such bright lights
Yet vision fades to a blur

A myriad of colours rush through
Only darkness holds its fort
Broken down...yet rationality doesn’t seep through...

Time has passed and we seem fine,
but we’re not alone in our subconscious minds…
tongues wag so often that tails seem so detached from the term…
we’re both trying our best and we know it…
I know you’ve been wanting to talk to me a gazillion times but are refraining yourself from doing so to protect me… but i long to heal your wound, even at the expense of mine…
That was just like slapping myself in the face…
I can’t find the switch…even if I did I think its fused…
Everything is apprehensive now…

school's started...but i haven't really gotten into the mood of things just yet...

had great fun at both hss and hall FOCs!!! however, somehow hall FOC seems to be more fun, maybe cos the people are closer...psb said he likes the after feeling of FOC cos everyone feels like a tight knit family, always hanging out tgt and stuff...i kinda agree with him on that...

lyndsey's asking me to move over to 43, fatein's asking charlene to move over too...my whole freaking clan is over at 43...but we're half-hearted about moving, firstly cos LZ will be alone if we do move and secondly we somehow feel kinda settled in 41...we're so used to the 41 toilet!!! but that irritant is seriously getting on our nerves!!! what's the deal with you man?! it isn't as if we're shouting! we're not that loud or noisy! get a life!!! you make me abhor you!!!

been getting a little too intoxicated over the past 2 weeks...i can't believe i merlion-ed for the 2nd time yest...crap...guess practice doesn't make perfect

been pondering over what you said...but serioulsy i don't exactly see a need for one now...and i just don't think i'm ready for it anyway...maybe i haven't been able to fully put it behind me...dumb i know...but i guess its taking longer than i expected...

So the Project Identity gig was rather disappointing due to the "not so perfect" organisers...but other than that i still kinda enjoyed myself...its fun performing with digression/sing and strum (we are not Xing and strum)!!!

Ho Jia Yan a.k.a Alexis a.k.a siao char bo is so much fun! she's like a major fun crapping partner...our frequencies intersect at the most peculiar wavelengths!!! bet the rest can't stand our ridiculous antics, but who cares!!! hahahaha...i'm glad to have gotten to know such and fun and nice person...and she resembles that Maria woman!!!

Louis Law a.k.a eldine look-a-like a.k.a Chris Cornell impersonator is madness la...he nv fails to amaze me with his originals and at times weird taste...like bjork and amy winehouse...SERIOUSLY! and i'm so jealous! $1500 for 7 hours of work!!! aaaahhh!!!!

Lyndsey Long a.k.a Miss "Zai" is seriously the bomb! She keeps us together and focused and does a great job at it! She sings and plays great! Without her we'd be tenderised pork chops! its nice to get to know her better...apart from just being someone else i happen to know in hall 8...didn't know we actually had quite fair bit in common, from frens to parents as well...hahaha...She's a super talented person...just worries a tad too much at times...Just reassure yourself that everythings' seriously not as bad as it seems...And pls don't second guess yourself too much...your Miss "Zai" to me!!!

Derek Sum a.k.a Jia Hui a.k.a PSB just seems so docile...hahaha...letting us make fun of him without staging too much of a protest...hahahaha...with all his "biyeeee,myeeeend, youuuuuuaaahh" hahaha...its just so him...but i seriously don't think it is a bad thing though...for all you know it could be the DEREK SUM TRADEMARK!!! and i'm not trying to be mean at all when i say this...this i do solemnly swear! I think the prob with him is that he's just too nice...hahahaha...this makes me feel kinda guilty at times when he becomes the victim of our verbal assaults...hahaha...

its amazing how certain things evolve over time...it isn't good, yet it ain't all that bad...

"better in time" is rather true, unfortunately "better" ain't "best" but i'll settle for it for now...

have been digressing positively for so long and moving totally out of that disgusting zone...but that one line she said just made me regress sooooo much...why does she have to ask me that everytime she sees me!!! why can't she just ask me how's studies? have u gained weight? where's your parents? are you staying throughout?...theres like a gazillion questions to ask me! what's the deal with that qn?! i know i can't blame her cos she probably doesn't know anything...BUT! URGH!!!!!!

Have been involved in a few interesting and fun activities so far...for one...my late night job...that night i happened to have my cam cos it was after Fatein's b'dae dinner...and we were bored...so we took a whole slew of pics...these are just some...

presenting the soon lee gang!!!

our source of late-night entertainment...and we're really awed by Criss Angel...seriously...tt guy is satanic...and cos sir and i were in a bus with lousy reception, i missed DAVID BECKHAM!!! by the time we swtiched buses...it was too late =(

LZ and I really got bored and took damn alot of pics la...and thank god i didn't watch "shutter"

Our group bonding over the super early morning breakfast...i am soooo gonna miss the hashbrowns and chix wings!!!

This is what OT looks like...

The 2 A.S there were really nice...unfortunately up till now i have no clue what does A.S stand for...hahaha...

Mr Paddy...he thinks this is a good pose, he thinks its very natural...hahahaha...This is our official mascot for soon lee....the MER-SHROOM!!!!!

although we worked at weird hours, we still managed to have fun while we were there...kinda miss the place and people there already....boohoo...hahahaha...

Managed to catch up with the choir peepal on Hazel's b'dae over at Timbre@ arts house...enjoyed the place alot...Managed to finally try the pizza that everyone's raving about...i kinda like the seafood platter too...hahaha...we ate like damn alotta stuff that night...

the atmosphere @artshouse is kinda different from substation...maybe cos its by the major longkang and opp the cbd but yet has such a relaxing feel "isn't it ironic~~don't you think..." hahahaha...pardon me, i just had to do that...

we managed to sneak in a cake for her...and she treated us to peach champagne...which i must say is kinda nice...

the bassist that night was kinda cute...maybelle and i both thought so too and started influencing the rest...den Edwin thought he was cute too!!! hahaha...but he seriously is la...but that's what we concluded from the rather distant view of him...unfortunately the lighting didn't allow for a better shot...

group shot!!!

Had dinner with Fatein, Germaine, Jeremias and Charlene Lee Shu Ling @ Shokudo...super backdated b'dae treat for fatein...hahaha...i must say the place is kinda nice...and as usual Miss Lee and I really whacked it!!!

the pizza @ timbre is way better than the one here...i swear!!!

we only managed to take photos of our dessert as we whacked the rest too quickly...

Fatein and Charlene

we had our traditional sake toast!!!

KAMPAI!!!

These people are really fun to be around with...the convo that night was really interesting...from hot guys to "shyboy"...hahaha...Jeremias...pls be careful on your way home...lol...

Haven't blogged in EONS!!!!! have had a whole lot of fun so far this hols...from job hunting to chilling and catching-up sessions to work to shopping to treasure8...FUN FUN FUN!!! shall upload some pics bit by bit...

On mother's day we had a good old english lunch at Sloane Court Hotel...Totally love and dig the old school british feel with the rustic mirrors and cosy fireplace... i soooo wanna go back there again...lee shu ling! we can add this to our already bursting list of places to eat!!!

Roomie and I actually planned to set-up a well-rounded enterprise to finance our ridiculous expenditures...so we had a few AGMs...one of which was over a rather fufilling dinner...

as always...we look most at ease in such a state...hahahaha...

shall upload the rest sometime later...feel exhausted...needa catch up on all the lost nights of slp...